Letter from the 1st Grade Teacher

This past weekend, Joel's first grade teacher's son competed at the Olympic trials for men's Marathon.  Despite a crippling injury, and knowing there was no way he would be able to finish the full marathon, he went - with his goal of being able to complete 8 miles of the course. He did.  And, being a new runner Joel and I chatted about it a bit.  Today, I get an email from his first grade teacher:


It read:

I just wanted to share a special experience I had with Joel today during our morning circle.  First of all he was the first one to ask me about my son Andrew and his race.  He so articulately shared his thoughts regarding how he should feel proud for running the eight miles and how all that really matters is that he did his very best and finishing the race wasn't the most important thing.  What he shared was so incredibly thoughtful, encouraging, and caring.   It became a very interesting lesson in determination and pride for the entire class.  I was quite touched. Certainly a conversation I will always remember. What a great kid.  I would love to relay his words to Andrew if that is OK with you.  I just wanted to share this with you.  Have a great evening.

My initial instinct for a reply was: 

I'm so glad that he said this - because in all my training for my many 1/2 marathons, he would always say things like: "how come you did not run further today?"  And, "what do you mean you placed 275th?"  "what do you mean you aren't going to win, then why run?" I mean, hundreds of times he has said things like this.  He seemed not to be able to fathom that I would be in a race that I might not try to win.  It wasn't until I made him run a mile with me (and he only completed 1/2 that mile before whining in pain), that I think I finally got through to him.

But my reply really was:

Thank you so much for sending this message along.  Of course please do share with Andrew -- and please also thank him for us as well.  His story was quite inspiring for my Joel - about working hard towards goals and not being defeated when obstacles step in your way.  We all rooted for Andrew here and were thinking of him this past weekend. Thank you for allowing his story to be apart of our family's conversation.  

It's so nice when your hard work and discussion pays off!  But it is even nicer to know that Joelly really meant everything he said, and really has grown from Andrew's story.  I'm proud of my little guy today, my little guy with big guy thoughts!

New Puppy Update

So, it is a sad update on our new puppy.

We have visited Wim twice since the fateful puppy selecting party day.  Two times for the boys to snuggle and love him, and for him to flop around running after them as they eventually got bored and rather watch TV.  No joke, there Joel Andrew is whining that he wants to watch a show and this little puppy is flopping after him saying: "hey, dude, pay attention to me!"  Of course, after we pointed that out Joel Andrew put the TV to the side.  Wish we could say the same for James.

So, we had noticed originally that his paw was a little different.  Two of his toes on his left paw seem to be joined.  Not a big deal, we thought initially.  Otter had something "not perfect" about her too, and we were ok with it - we called her our discount dog.  Maybe we are supposed to always get discount dogs.  Angus probably should have been a discount dog.

A week goes by and we see him again and his toes are looking more pronounced, but we do not care.  If I can't run with him, no big deal.  We didn't know if he would like running anyway, and what are the chances I will actually still be running, too?  This is not the only reason I am getting this dog - far from it, so if he can't run, no big deal and we will be ok.  Forget about his paw, enjoy time with him and adore him.  Then go out to dinner.

Fast forward one more week (last week) and we get to see him again.  Now he seems a ton bigger, and with just one quick glance to the cute guy - it is unavoidable, you can see his paw right away.  In just one week it got bigger.  He is not walking funny, he doesn't seem to notice, but it is growing or getting worse.  There is a difference.  The breeder/trainer is going to take him to a specialist and we will see what happens.  We leave and I give him a kiss goodbye, and I casually mention to Joel Husband I am nervous and with his complete agreement and validation of my nervousness it grows and turns into now I am really sad.

I google the situation, which you should never do.  And, I get mad at myself.  We should have also never involved the kids and never named the guy and not visited him these weeks.  We are now attached to this poor guy and I feel terrible.  I knew not to do this - sort of in the same vein as don't count your chickens, name your child after it is born, you haven't actually won the lotto until you cash that ticket.  I knew puppies can get sick, bad things can happen.  But we were excited to enjoy this process as a family, and here we are.

So, the trainer/breeder brings Wim to the vet yesterday, and what we have suspected is coming true.  It is not just a simple live with it deformity, and he will need surgery, next week.  We were to take him home Wednesday, but that is done now.  He will get the surgery on Monday and he will need to stay with the breeder for at least another two weeks.  Joel spoke with the trainer, and she mentioned something about other litters too.

I had to tell the boys and we discussed that Wim may need special care, care that we are not experienced enough to give him and he may need to stay with Gail but we can visit him and still love him.  Joel Andrew, ever the President, said he was sad but immediately noted that he goes to school all day and I go to work, so Wim really might need someone who can take care of him all day long.

So, this is where we are now.  In puppy limbo.  Our little guy who snuggled with my little guy, and won his heart -- may not be ours after all.  We are going to wait to see how the surgery goes, and how the recovery goes.  I am promised that if he indeed does need special care, he will be well cared for and will stay with the breeder or go to a home that can accommodate him.  Oh boy I hope so.If this is the case we would be in line for the next litter, but I don't know if I can stand this again!

Snow Days?

This winter has been strange, to say the least.  We have had two snow days, but they flanked a weekend where we were away, so we really didn't enjoy them. We are having a snow morning here now with a two hour delay - and the kids are watching TV.  Too quick to get anything "snow fun" in, not quick enough to get up and out without the TV too...

I'm longing for the day where we are holed up at home and making puzzles and watching family movies, and all that fun stuff.  Maybe next week, when it is vacation!

NEAQ with James

 Today James and I spend a lovely day together in Boston.  I used to do this all the time with the boys, when I wasn't working, or had a less-stressful part time job.  But haven't really been able to carve it in with just James, and now that Joel Andrew is in school.  Part of me wonders - is it because I am selfish?  Want a run day?  Need a day to get the house in order?  Or is it because I am sad we will be missing Joelly?  Because we pay so much for James to go to an awesome pre-school that he loves and it is hard to justify taking him out of an awesome structured environment to end up spending lots of money in Boston?  Either way, I have resigned myself to a nice balance.  James is going to Kindergarten in the Fall; the summer is going to be incredibly busy; we need to get 4 of these days in before it is all gone.  Day one, happened today and it was glorious.

For some reason, these photos are all out of order.  But enjoy anyway.

So, we went into the Aquarium, which is a family trip favorite.  I have to day, first of all, it was 60 degrees, in Boston, on February 1 today.  It was a bit unerving, but we rocked the puffy vests.  The aquarium was DEAD today - hardly a person.  See it in my pictures, it was like we had the place to ourselves.  It was clean, and nicer than I remember - probably due to the lack of people.  It was also expensive.  This was the first time I didn't buy the membership, so for just he and I it was almost $50!  But I guess taking care of all those fishys are expensive!

He had the map, we touched the rays, he loved this.  We saw the penguins.  One thing I notice about the differences between my boys - James can stare at something for hours.  Joel would look at it, want to learn about it, and want to move on.  James wants to watch what they are doing, talk about what they are doing (don't bother him with facts, he knows what is going on and those penguins do not like the water today, it is too cold).We had 90 minutes in the Aquarium, which would have been overload for just my Joelly - for James, I had to usher him out.

He said his favorites were the penguins, seadragons, and touching the rays.  When they were little, if they were good they usually left with a toy - and James seemed to remember this so we are now the proud owners of two new Ray stuffed animals (James thought of his brother, and although I resisted, buy one get one 1/2 off - thanks, NEAQ).

After lots and lots of fun we went to the North End to meet Ama and Grumpy and Suzanne for dessert.  Yes, this kid got dessert before lunch! The boy spend 20 minutes in the bathroom with Grumpy, which Grumpy still can: "never comprehend how your boys enjoy sitting in public restrooms doing their business."  (he is a bit of a germie).  Ama and I had a good laugh at this.  They spent an hour together today and 20 minutes of it was in the potty.

Our meeting with Ama and Grumpy was brief, we decided to get some real food and had sandwiches at Bricco, which was a good choice.  The good weather gave us a place to sit outside in the alley.  James loved watching the birds.  We got lots of delicious food for dinner tonight too.

He ate his sandwich right up and exclaimed a few times: "I LOVE this sandwich!" He loves me too, he said.  We drove home, had a fun car wash experience and he passed out in the last 10 minutes of the ride.  It was a great day with my big guy.

It makes me sad when I see all the moms and their strollers, chasing after their babies and remembering I was one of them.  But then I get happy, because I have my big boys who chat with me and still tell me they love me, and don't require diaper bags, and eat delicious food with me (well, James does), more and more.

Here's to a few more day dates together, James!