Cake Cake Balls

It happened last week. On a Monday. I went into my thrice yearly visit to Trader Joes, where I usually stock up and buy the family favorites in dry and frozen foods. 

So, this visit I begin like any other, happily, in the produce aisle. Uneventful and I even pass up the sample station as I move to the calming white glow of the dairy aisle. As I leave the Coffee station with an already half half filled cart, and turn onto my favorite-- the frozen food aisle, I get a bit nervous. 

There I was, cruising up and down, getting the things we need -- frozen mac & cheese, rice dishes, and then all of a sudden I noticed it -- or the lack of it --- it was not there.  It was no where to be seen.  

I immediately panic.  This has happened before.  I know the drill, this is no drill.  This is not going to be good. I went over and I grabbed the Trader Joe's man in the brightly colored Hawaiian shirt and I uncontrollably blurted at him: "Where are my Cake Cake Balls?" 

The man looked at me slightly confused. But, then, after a few beats he realized what was angering me and immesiately got a consoling look. "Oh, you mean the Danish pancakes?"

"Yes, where are my Cake Cake Balls?"

Notice how I do not relent on the proper name of the item?  And I consistently refer to them as mine?  This is the sign of a person in panic. 

The man sat, trying to decide how to give me the bad news, for a good 10 seconds.  He has done this before, I could tell, I am not the only one with a strange attachment to this frozen food.  I think he can tell too, that I already know the answer.  This is what he is thinking about.  How is this "Cake Cake Ball" lady going to react?  Is she going to cry?  Yell? Make a scene?  Something abnormal is going to happen, because she clearly is way too invested in this.

So, he just comes right out and says it, no apology, no nothing.  Just rips the bandaid. "Discontinued."

And, I actually scream in the middle of the frozen food section.  Legit scream.  He jumps, and everyone turns.  People come from other aisles.  I go on and on.  I buy 10 bags of these things three times per year.  My sons eat them at least twice a week.  They are a staple.  I tell other people about them.  They can't be discontinued, everyone loves them.

"Mam, they have been gone for a few months now."

"You mean there are none in the back I can grab from you?  Some sitting in a store 30 miles away?"

"Mam, you can make them, I can help you find the ingredients."

"Have you ever tried to make them?  At 7:45am when the bus is coming in 10 minutes?  Do you know they require a special pan?  Do you sell the special pan?  I have friends who introduced us to the special pan.  They come over and THEY make them for us as she is Danish and she has the talent.  You have to be talented to know when to flip the ball."

No joke, I went on and on about the expertise and cleaning needed when making Abelskievers (Cake Cake Balls) from scratch.

"I'm sorry, Mam."

"You did this to me once before with the Baignan Bhartha."

"Excuse me, what now?"

"The Indian eggplant dish.  You just ripped it away one day without any warning.  I still longingly look in the Indian frozen food section hoping you will bring it back, but no."

"You can write a letter."

"Oh, I will."  (then I calm) - "Sorry, I know it is not your fault.  Who is going to tell my boys?!"

I finish my shopping trip.  Deciding what I may need to stock pile on for their next heartless cut of my favorite product, and the entire check out process goes very similar to the situation above.  Everyone suggests I make them myself.

Haven't told the boys yet.  Went in the freezer and found three cake cake balls in the blue bag hiding in the back.  We will make an event out of it, and one night - with a bottle of wine, I will make 500 cake cake balls from the pan which takes talent and I will freeze those suckers.  And you know what else?  I won't need to drive 30 minutes to Trader Joes to get them either.